Pegging is one of the most searched topics in sexual wellness — and one of the least talked about openly. If you've been curious about it but every guide you found either felt overly clinical or weirdly over-the-top, you're in the right place. This is a straightforward beginner's guide: what pegging actually is, what you need to get started, and how to make it work well from the first time.
We carry everything you need at French Postcard in Calgary — harnesses, compatible dildos, and the right lube. If you're not in Calgary, we ship discreetly anywhere in Canada.
In this guide:
What Is Pegging?
Pegging is penetrative anal sex where the giving partner wears a strap-on harness with a dildo and penetrates the receiving partner. It's most often discussed in the context of a woman pegging a man, but it's a sex act that any couple can explore regardless of gender — the mechanics are the same.
Interest in pegging has grown a lot over the past several years, and that makes sense. Anal stimulation for people with penises activates the prostate gland — often called the P-spot — which is densely packed with nerve endings. For many people, prostate stimulation is one of the most intense forms of pleasure they've experienced. And for couples, it can also flip a dynamic in an interesting way that a lot of people find they really like.
None of that requires a long preamble. If you're curious, you should try it. That's what this guide is for.
The 3 Things You Actually Need
You don't need much to get started with pegging. The kit is simple:
A harness
This is what the giving partner wears. It holds the dildo in place so your hands are free. You want one that's adjustable, comfortable, and has a properly sized O-ring for the dildo you choose. The Leatherette Curious by Strap-On-Me is what we recommend for beginners — more on it below.
A body-safe dildo with a flared base
The flared base is what locks into the harness O-ring. It also makes the dildo safe for anal use (prevents it from going too far in). For pegging specifically, a slightly curved dildo tends to work better than a straight one — the curve angles naturally toward the prostate. More on sizing and picks below.
A thick water-based lube
Not regular lube — a thicker, cushioning formula specifically made for anal play. Sliquid Sassy is the one we recommend most. It stays put longer than regular water-based lube and reduces friction without going numb. More on this below too.
That's genuinely it. You don't need a whole kit of accessories for your first time — just these three things done well.
How to Actually Get Started
The conversation beforehand matters as much as the physical prep. Make sure both partners actually want to try this — not just one person nudging the other. Enthusiastic consent on both sides makes everything better.
For the receiving partner: Go to the bathroom beforehand — that's the main prep, and it's genuinely all most people do. Some people prefer a light rinse with a douche; that's a personal choice, not a requirement. Trim your nails if you're planning to add manual stimulation. And most importantly — relax. Tension is the main thing that makes anal play uncomfortable. A warm shower, breathing slowly, and starting with your own fingers or a small plug before the strap-on goes a long way.
Start smaller than you think. If the receiving partner hasn't had much anal experience, start with finger(s) or a slim toy to warm up before introducing the strap-on. This isn't optional — the anal sphincter needs time to relax and adjust. Skipping this step is the most common reason first attempts don't go well.
For the giving partner: The harness takes a minute to figure out the first time — try it on before you're in the moment, adjust the fit, and get comfortable with how the dildo sits. You'll have more control than you expect once the harness is properly fitted.
Use a LOT of lube. More than feels necessary. Reapply during. The friction from not enough lube is what makes anal play uncomfortable — with enough of the right lube, most people's experience is completely different.
The Harness: Leatherette Curious by Strap-On-Me
Leatherette Harness Curious — Strap-On-Me
$84 CAD · Rose Gold, Fuchsia & Metallic Green in stockThis is the harness we recommend most for people starting out with pegging in Canada, and honestly for anyone. Strap-On-Me makes quality products and the Curious is their best beginner design — adjustable waist and thigh straps that fit XS-M and L-XXL (both sizes come in the same package), a double stretchy silicone O-ring that holds most standard dildos securely, and a build that's actually comfortable to wear for more than five minutes.
The leatherette is easy to clean — wipe down with a damp cloth. The rose gold holographic finish is genuinely beautiful. It also comes with a second belt that doubles as a restraint if you want to explore that, but that's just a bonus.
Compatible with all Strap-On-Me dildos and most other harness-compatible toys. If you're buying your first pegging kit in Canada, start here.
Choosing a Dildo for Pegging
Any dildo with a flared base is technically harness-compatible, but for pegging specifically there are a few things worth thinking about.
Size: Start smaller than you think you need. A 5–6 inch insertable length at about 1.3 inches diameter is a genuinely good starting point for most people. The receiving partner can always ask for more, but starting too big and having a bad experience is much harder to recover from.
Curve: A slight curve toward the front angles the dildo naturally toward the prostate. This is why the P&G Spot dildo is one of our top picks for pegging — it's literally designed for this.
Here are the dildos we recommend pairing with the Curious harness, all in stock:
P&G Spot Dildo — Strap-On-Me
From $64 CAD · S & M in stockOur top pick for pegging. The name says it — P&G Spot stands for P-spot and G-spot. The curve on this dildo is deliberately angled to reach the prostate during penetration, which is the main thing that takes pegging from "fine" to genuinely good for the receiving partner. Liquid silicone, smooth, flexible without being floppy, suction cup base that clicks into the harness O-ring cleanly.
If you're building a pegging kit from scratch, this dildo plus the Curious harness is the combination we'd point you toward first.
Dildolls — Love to Love
$64 CAD · 4 colourways in stockIf the receiving partner is new to anal play and wants to start with something less intense, the Dildolls are a great option. 14cm insertable, 3.6cm diameter — that's on the smaller side, which is exactly what you want for a first experience. The gentle curve still works toward prostate stimulation without being as pronounced as the P&G Spot.
Liquid silicone, harness compatible, and honestly just a beautiful toy. People sometimes assume a "fun-looking" dildo means it's not functional — not the case here. These work well and the size is genuinely beginner-appropriate.
Soft Realistic Dildo — Strap-On-Me
$58 CAD · Vanilla & Noir in stockA straight realistic dildo — no curve, but well-made and comfortable. Good pick if the receiving partner specifically prefers a straight profile, or if you're using it for both vaginal and anal play with the same harness setup. Soft-touch silicone, defined head and veining, suction cup base, multiple sizes available.
Lube: Please Don't Skip This Part
If there's one thing that determines whether a first pegging experience goes well or badly, it's lube. The anal canal has no natural lubrication, so without enough of the right lube, friction makes everything uncomfortable — and that's a fast way to not want to try it again.
What you want is a thicker water-based lube — not standard water-based lube (that's too thin and dries out too fast), and not silicone-based (that can break down silicone toys over time). A gel-consistency formula designed for anal play is the right tool for this.
We recommend Sliquid Natural Sassy 255mL ($34) — it's a water-based, thicker gel formula specifically made for anal use. It stays slick longer, doesn't go sticky, and is made from clean ingredients (no parabens, glycerin, or harsh chemicals). A 255mL bottle will last you a long time. Apply generously on the dildo and the receiving partner before you start, and keep it close to reapply during.
Positions for Your First Time
Doggy style (modified): Receiving partner on all fours or lying flat on their stomach with a pillow under their hips. This is the easiest position for the giving partner to find the right angle and control the depth. Good starting point for most people.
Receiving partner on top: Receiving partner straddles the giving partner who is lying down. This gives the receiving partner total control over depth and pace — which is ideal for a first time, since they can move exactly as slowly as they need to. The downside is it requires more coordination once you're both learning how the harness works.
Spooning: Both partners lying on their sides, giving partner behind. Low intensity, easy to communicate, and comfortable for both. Not as much depth or range of motion, but a relaxed option for beginners.
Whichever position you try — go slow. The receiving partner should signal when to go deeper. Don't assume more = better until you know what works for that person.
Common Questions About Pegging in Canada
Does pegging hurt?
It shouldn't, if you've warmed up properly and used enough lube. Some pressure and fullness is normal; sharp pain is not. If it hurts, stop and either add more lube, use fingers or a smaller toy to warm up more, or try a different position. Pain is your body telling you to slow down — listen to it.
Does the receiving partner need to douche beforehand?
Not necessarily. Going to the bathroom beforehand and showering is enough for most people. Douching is a personal preference, not a requirement. If you do want to douche, a simple anal bulb with water is fine — just don't overdo it, as excessive douching can irritate the tissue.
Can the giving partner feel anything through the harness?
Some, yes — there's pressure from the harness base during thrusting that many people find arousing. Some harnesses (not the Curious, but others) have a pocket for a small vibrator inside. If the giving partner wants more direct stimulation, combining pegging with a wearable vibrator or manual stimulation works well.
What size dildo should we start with for pegging?
Smaller than you think. For most beginners, 5–6 inches insertable length at around 1.3–1.5 inches diameter is a good starting point. The P&G Spot Dildo in size S or the Dildolls are both good beginner options available in store and online in Canada.
Where can we buy a pegging kit in Calgary?
We carry everything you need at French Postcard — 102 4 Street NE, Calgary. The harness, the dildo, and the lube are all in stock. Same-day pickup available, or we ship discreetly anywhere in Canada if you're not in the city. Come in and ask — we're not weird about it, this is genuinely what we're here for.
Do I need a special condom for pegging?
Using a condom on the dildo isn't required if you're using it only with one partner, but it makes cleanup easier. If you're switching between anal and vaginal use in the same session, putting a fresh condom on between switches is good practice to prevent bacterial transfer.
Everything You Need Is In Stock at French Postcard
Harness, dildo, lube — available for same-day pickup in Calgary NE or shipped discreetly anywhere in Canada.
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